How it all began

You know those young kids that don't ever think anything could ever go wrong in their life, or that their actions do not effect (or is it affect??) others?  Yeah?  Well, that was me.  18 and invisible.  Nothing could stop me, slow me down or scare me.  Until....I seen 2 pink lines.  Yup, that is what happened.  I was 18, wreck-less and on a path for disaster.  Crap.  What am I supposed to do now?!  I vividly recall saying to my best friend "But, I don't know HOW to be pregnant!".  I legit thought there was a certain way to "be pregnant".  I didn't have a job, had dropped out of school and lived with my mom.  WHEW!  I was ready!  Wait, no...no I wasn't.  34 weeks, that is as far as we made it, Ethan and I.  He was born weighing in at 6lbs.  From the time I got those 2 pink lines, my life started to change.  Nothing was the same anymore, I was living for someone else and I had to be responsible.  I read everything I could, learned all I could and educated myself in ways I never thought I would.  When he came, I was READY.  One thing I forgot, I knew HOW to install his car seat and I knew he needed to sit in it...butttt I didn't know how to loosen the harness.  My first experience as a mother, outside of the hospital, was Ethan riding home, just sitting in his car seat.  No harness.  BUT, I sat back there...so that made it safe. *insert sarcasm* 

13 years late, I have this car seat thing under control.  To the point that it is a huge passion.  In these last 13 years a lot more has changed.  I got married and divorced anddd married again, this time to my best friend. I had a beautiful girl, Toryn, a spunky boy, Julian and most recently 2 more babies!  Yup, that is 5.  Jaxson and Ruby are only 13 months apart, but it has been a blast.  

Ruby was quite a surprise.  Our plan was to wait, but I guess that is what I get for making plans with my own life (who am I kidding, I don't control it!).  Here I am though, 5 babies later!  Did I mention my husbands kids?  No?  Oh, yeah...he has 4!  Do the math?  That is 9.  Nine.  The ages look like this 13, 13, 11, 9, 8, 8, 6, 21 months and 6 months.  

This isn't going to gush about how my heart is now outside of my body, use a bunch of fancy words that most people don't know...it is just going to be real and what comes to my mind.  My struggles with life and overcoming all that is thrown at me.  My successes, my children and my marriage.  The ups and downs, as real as it gets.